Building A Better Way

By Carol S. Siege, PCC

Founder, Family Pathways Coaching, LLC

When my boys were young, there were days so challenging, the best I could do was to simply survive until bedtime. I was rushing, managing, pushing, and pulling just to get through the day. There was no time to stop and adjust, let alone smell the roses. I was barely keeping my head above water.

It’s counterintuitive, but I have come to understand that those overwhelming times are when it is most important to take the time to adjust and even smell the roses.

When we are fighting to get through every moment, that may be exactly when we need to find another way. I know, I know, I know! I’ve been there! Overwhelmed, exhausted, swimming upstream… How in the world are we supposed to have enough energy left, let alone the mind space, to course-correct? That’s usually the time we are so exhausted getting through every single day we can’t even see we need the help – we know it, of course, but we can’t stop now, we have too much to do!

There were times when all of my boys were in therapy – different therapists, different times, different locations. And yes, there were times I sped down the highway, racing to make an appointment, only to realize halfway there I was heading to the wrong office. Please don’t tell, but I fell asleep one time and almost missed picking up a son from a playdate. Another time, I nearly left my son at karate class (thank God for good friends).

I have been there, really! Four sons, all diagnosed with a variety of special needs, can keep a mom’s head spinning! There was a time when every night I was up multiple times: one son wetting his bed, another enduring night terrors, and then there was the newborn. I remember one afternoon hopping into our SUV and being met by such a cacophony of voices and noises I couldn’t help but burst into laughter (better than bursting into tears).